What kind of life is that? Sometimes—many times it is what we settle for instead of perservering before the throne—or pushing ahead and believing God for what He wants for us in the first place! He does NOT want mediocre for His blessed children!
Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future”. (NIV)
This morning at 2:34—well, probably just a few minutes before that, the Lord woke me from a deep sleep. I woke, rolled over and snuggled deeper, only to hear Him in my heart/head beckon me from that nestled postition. Well, old flesh immediately says, “I hate it when You do that…wake me up from sleep…YOU know how much I love sleep….” I was instantly rebuked, “No, Lord, I’m sorry, I don’t hate it…. You know I love YOU more than sleep.”
So, I rolled over on my back, as if to ready myself to “listen”. His instructions are clear. “Get up-go to your prayer room, lay before me in prayer.” I try just for 2 seconds, to reason with Him, that I can pray here….but no I can’t. I pray out loud when He instructs me like this…and I KNOW already that this will be an outloud prayer. Not a whispered or silent type.
As I roll the covers back, my thoughts begins to “wander” down the corridor of my mind filled with pictures of family. Is someone in distress? The brink of disaster? A fire? A tornado? (There was that one time of the tornado—an old post…don’t remember which one–you’d have to hunt back to last year sometime…)
I go to the bathroom, then on through the dining room, where the Bibles, books and computer is arranged, just as I’d left them hours before…walk into the kitchen and look at the clock, thinking surely it must be almost “getting up time” anyway. Not so. Only 2:34. Good sleep being missed. Girls you have no clue how much this youngin loves to sleep!
I walk into the prayer room/library. Small room. Only big enough for the “granddaddy chair”, two book cases and a desk. Just enough floor space that I can lie down and meet the Master of the house. So I take my place. Same place everytime.
As I began, I told Him, “I don’t know what You’ve called me here for ….but that’s okay. I don’t have to know.” My prayer began slow, as He blew the sleep from my heart, I began to weep before Him with the urgency of NEEDING Him to hear my plea. Not knowing who or what I was praying for, I left it up to Him. Many of you were prayed for. Many of you that I converse with on a daily basis via e-mail or a visit to your blog were on my heart. So, your name was called.
The Lord prompted my spirit….”it’s not about the numbers, Angie. It’s about the message.” I asked for the message. For the annointing. For His Spirit to rest upon me and pour into me what needs to be said. To the hurting. To the damaged. To the brokenhearted. To you and, yes, to me. He pours it in….I pour it out.
I can’t tell you how many times a day I think about what the Lord wants to use my life for. What He’s up to. But girls, it is all up to Him. Whatever He wants to do with me, use me for I am His. Totally.
I love my precious family. My sweet darling man. My girls, their husbands, their children, my parents, my siblings…but I belong to the Lord. For His work….I don’t know what it’s to be. It may only be to get up at 2:34 a.m. and pray for someone I don’t know. Someone I’ve never had the pleasure of a neck hug. But that’s okay too. If the Lord crosses our paths here….then it is for a reason. I question Him not.
Dear sweet sister-in-Christ, it is not about the number of visitors I have or you have. Nor about the comments or who they come from. It is about the message of Christ….and getting it out to the lost and dying. It’s about Him. All about Him.
Now, I am off to bed again. I have prayed. Laid back down, couldn’t get you off my heart and mind. So I got BACK up and went to the computer. I needed to tell you that we don’t have to live a mediocre life. That He has a plan and purpose for EACH ONE OF US! YOU and me! All we need to do is be obedient. (I’m not even checking this one for boo-boo’s…so please excuse—I am tired—I’ve never posted this early.)
April 3rd, 2008 at 7:28 am
Angie… I am so glad to know that I am not the only one that God wakes from sleep to pray.. and sometimes I don’t even know why.. I just know that I am called to get up, get on my knees and pray!! Praying for you today!!! Please keep my little girl in your prayers, she has been in deep depression and seems to now be coming out of it… it’s a long story.. but I know that God has His loving hand on her life!!
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:31 am
WOW…what a powerful post!!>>I too am SO thankful that God DOES have a perfect plan for me. I’m realizing…for me at least, that the journey….is becoming MORE rewarding to me…than I think the destination will be!! Ya know what I mean.>>God is daily leading, and guiding me and I see his handprints on my heart and life everyday and he’s giving me SUCH an amazing longing…..to run after him with ALL I have!!>>You’ve really BLESSED my soul today!!!>>Kim~
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:48 am
Mmmm. . .you’ve touched my Angie. Thank you.
April 3rd, 2008 at 10:43 am
This post gave me chills. I so thoroughly enjoyed reading this. Thank-you for sharing your deepest sweet times with the Lord. Thank-you for being obedient. Big hugs to you dear friend!
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:11 am
Oh Angie – your radical obedience amazes me. I was so blessed reading your post. I hope God gets you up in the night more often if this is the kind of good stuff we are going to get from it!>Bless you girl – you are 100% owned by Him – it shows!
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:50 am
And yes, I have most definitely read Home to Holly Springs – I can’t get enough of Father Tim! Jan Karon’s books are the best literature on the market these days, in my opinion.
April 3rd, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I’ve just seen Jesus and He’s radiating from this blog post! I’m so thankful I can call you my bloggy friend. But most importantly, my Sister in Christ! >Love you!
April 3rd, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Thank you for your total obedience to God, I appreciate your faithful heart. I love you so much, thanks for your prayers. Praying for you always.
April 3rd, 2008 at 6:28 pm
Angie,>Thank you for sharing this experience of obedience to His will. Your testimony strengthens me! God bless you and hug you and warm you up, especially when you are on the floor at 2:30 AM!
April 3rd, 2008 at 7:20 pm
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:48 pm
Angie:>I don’t normally like “music” on blogs while I’m trying to read and focus, but somehow Joy William’s song perfectly fit your early a.m. post.>>Yes…I “read” Jesus in you! Should our paths not cross in the literal flesh of this lifetime, I will see Jesus in you in heaven.>>This is one of your finest posts… at least to me, because of its raw vulnerability and heart! So, the next time the Holy Spirit prompts you to get up in the middle of the night, grab a blanket and some coffee, and get to typing!>>peace~elaine
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:28 pm
Very timely post…Thank-you!>Crystal
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:45 pm
Angie, wow!! I think you were praying for me:)Thanks!! I was inspired by your “unquestioning” attitude toward God’s purpose for you.>A good example to me of the resting I desperately seek. I find it an irony that I fight to rest…>He’s still workin’ on me!(song my kids used to play when they were little) Thanks for your obedience.
April 4th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Hello Angie!>Thank you for your beautiful blog. I found it because you used he phrase “I Love You More” and was delighted when I found your post and entire blog dedicated to prayer. I have written a book called “I Love You More” which was the answer to a prayer…one night I found myself praying for my sister, a voice clearly answered me and said, “your sister is fine, pray for your nephew” and as I did the whole idea for the book flooded my mind and heart. It is a beautiful story of love shared between a mother and child. A few years later as I was listening to a CD of a favorite minister tears began pouring down my face that I describe as not being mine. A message came to me again and it said that I Love You More is really the expression of love between Creator and child but that at the time mother and child was the relationship most would relate to. So, if you get a chance take a look at my book…and when you read it…know it is a message of God’s love for each and every one of us! If we only knew how very loved we are anything would be possible! Have a bright and blessed lifetime!>Keep Shining!>Laura Duksta
April 4th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
So thankful for your praying heart, Angie, my friend. Whatever He calls us to, He will do it, through us. >>Hope your weekend is great!>love & cyberhugs,>Vicki
April 7th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
Angie, you are truly a blessing. I enjoy reading your blogs and I am always touched by your words and your obedience to the Lord. I pray that I will open my life completely to Him so His Holy Spirit can use me as He uses You. Just last week, I copied your blog and sent it to my sister-in-law for her to read. (she’s not able to get on the internet where she’s at right now) Anyway, I received a phone call from her and she was sooooo bless by your blog and she said that it was right on time. She shared it with her room-mate and they both were blessed. >Keep on writing as the Lord directs you. You are truly a blessing to others. Also, please add my sister-in-law to your prayer list. Her name is Cheryl. The next 8 to 10 months are going to be really trying for her and she could use all of our prayers. Thank you Angie.>Your sister in Christ, Lucy