Exactly one month ago today, our lives changed.   If you had told me I would have experienced some of the emotions I have felt, I might have stared at you in slight disbelief.  No one prepared me for this feeling, the deluge of emotions that have encompassed my days.

I was talking with one of our girls last night and expressing some “slight mama worry”….and she said, “mama, give me back to Jesus and stop worrying”.

That’s the first thing you have to do when you step away from the altar of surrender, you must let go.  Let go of the “thought” that you have any control whatsoever of anything that happens at home.  Because you don’t.  Of course, I never had control anyway, but it sure is a nice thought to tuck around myself at bedtime.

This has been an especially difficult week simply because of that old enemy, “discouragement” when I don’t get it right.  On the upside, I was able to carry on a half decent short conversation with one of our uber drivers this week.  Surprised myself.

We have the absolute BEST profesoras here at Cincel.  They are patient and kind.  Correcting with a heart that wants you to “get it”.  I love that.  That’s just like the Lord.  He corrects us with a heart that wants us to “get it”….and release it to HIM.  This gift of being able to learn the language that will enable us to minister when we get to Bolivia is just that, a gift.  Not one to put up in a closet, but one to use daily…and I so bad want to get it and use it.

That’s our biggest prayer needs:  Strength to overcome the discouragement, and the ability to comprehend, hear the sounds, form the words, and get it right.  There have been several fighting various illnesses, from allergies, to viral issues, etc.  We need to all stay well!  Add that to the prayer list. 🙂

We’ve had a few friends contact us this week to encourage us and let us know they are praying–you have no idea how much that is appreciated!  That makes us not feel so separated from you.  YOU are so important to us.  YOU are part of this team–this mission team headed to Bolivia.  We thank you every time we go to the fresh market on Saturday’s.  It’s because of your support that we can get the things we do, and because of your support, God will enable us to GET THIS language and share His love with those who have yet to hear about His great love.

Jeff and I thank you.  Words cannot express it enough.  I had a friend contact me this week and said that the Lord had prompted her to double their giving.  Then her husband’s job situation changed somewhat.  But she continued to listen to the prompting of the Holy Spirit…friends, that message came to me on a day when my body was tired, my mind was aching from the discouragement of not getting “it” again in class that day and I was simply full of “what is HE doing with us…two old[er] folks in this place surrounded by young people and young families…. But HE called….and we raised our hands and said “yes”.

We felt a compelling with every single missionary message we heard.  We knew one day God was going to do something with us, but actually moving and serving ON the field never entered our minds.  Our work first started by giving.  We support several missionaries, and we are thankful to be a part of a mission work that we can’t actually “go see”, but we can help keep them on the field…reaching the lost.  And that is exactly what YOU are doing with each donation.

So thank you.  I cried the day we left and hugged our dear brother (from another mother), Floyd Aycock as he left us at the airport.  I felt like the last thread of my normalcy was leaving on that red truck.  But this is a new normal.  And the “normal” seems to change as it become necessary.

I suppose I didn’t pick up on the fact there would be so many “different” sacrifices.  I told a friend just tonight that one thing I missed (when she asked me what I missed) was the ability to hop in my car and go anywhere, anytime.  Independence.  I never heard a missionary talk about the sacrifice of their independence.  I heard them talk about lack of water, electricity, I heard them talk about parasites, and sickness, but not independence.  That one struck me.  I loved to get in my car and GO.

This week I looked up the word, Sacrifice.

Sacrifice:  the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim.

It hit me like a brick; the lost.  We must surrender the desired independence to learn the language to reach the lost.  Granted, I won’t have any more independence when we get to the field… but I will be able to converse with the people.

I want God to so fill us with the passion to learn this language that our thought processes are “on fire”, as one of my teachers said this week (when I got three in a row correct–blind miracle!).

Thank you all for praying–for keeping up with us, for sending us notes via email, instagram, linkedIn and facebook.  It has helped me so much.  I have read every one and read them to Jeff.  We are encouraged by your love and care.

Tomorrow is market day (Farmer’s Market) and I hope you will join us via instagram or facebook when we get to post our pictures!  We love you all!

© Angie Knight 2017.  All rights reserved.

sacrifice. Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com Unabridged. Random House, Inc. http://www.dictionary.com/browse/sacrifice (accessed: May 27, 2017).