Standing by the window, high up on the fifth floor of the hospital in Central Florida, looking out at a day that was sunny and bright. Behind me though, coming in fast, were dark clouds of life. I could sense them in my spirit. They were threatening. The driving force was death. But our driving force was Life. And faith.
Just behind me lay Wanda, with mother by her side and Aimee seated in a chair at the foot of the bed. We were listening to praise music from a CD I had made especially for Wanda with some of her favorite songs. Songs we had sung, learned, and worshipped our Lord at our last Sister’s Retreat.
“We have come to worship the Lord, we have come to worship the Lord, bow down before Him, love and adore Him, we have come to worship the Lord.”
Although, the words were not exactly true, in the sense that the reason we were at the hospital, was to worship the Lord; however, they were true in the fact that we have learned to worship Him in all circumstances. This was not an easy circumstance in which we found ourselves. Nevertheless, we worshipped. Turning the small hospital room into a veritable temple of God.
As our tears flowed, and my mother’s hands rose toward heaven, I knew without a doubt that God’s heart was touched. It was this picture of faith and worship, that Mark brought Victoria in to love on her mommy. She was such a brave girl. Even at the young age of “almost” five, she knew there was something seriously wrong with mommy. Yet, she put on a brave face and smiled as she leaned down with daddy’s strong arms holding her tight she kissed mommy’s cheek.
Wanda felt that kiss and her tired face smiled up at her sweet girl. I know her heart ached. Even more than ours did. She knew in her heart she would soon be leaving the care and raising of this little child to other hands and hearts. It would not be her hands that tucked her in at night, nor her ears that heard her prayers. But she had an incredible faith in God and complete trust in Him to see the job done.
More to come…
Be sure and click on the collage for enlarging the photos!
January 23rd, 2009 at 1:08 am
Wanda was such a loving, and very precious example of Jesus in action.
January 23rd, 2009 at 1:16 am
Okay, you got me crying now! It brings back memories of when I lost my best friend to breast cancer. She fought a hard 18 month battle. I was her caregiver during that time… and afterwards I cared for her children (10 yr old daughter, and 14 yr. old son at the time) for 3 years. I think of her often… sometimes I smile and other times I cry. We were as close as sisters too. But nothing compares to blood sisters. I am sure of that. I don’t even want to know how that feels. I guess my sister was close to the feeling when 5 years ago I was on deaths door… then God performed a miracle! And here I am! Why he heals some, and not others we will never know here on earth. But I do know that God is soveriegn. He is in control. You are in my prayers dear sister in Christ. God bless you…
January 23rd, 2009 at 1:28 am
Angie,>>I am honored to comment on this precious and most endearing post. Your heart wide open for all of us to see. We feel your pain, as the tears rolled down my face, I rejoiced with the bittersweet way in which her daughter had to say goodbye…for now.>>Your gift of writing will be the salve on the wound that seems to bleed afresh as you draw close to the same day that she died, a year later. The weather will remind you, smells will remind you…but praise God, your writing will be the muscle you flex and stretch to bear in faith all that has been and all that is yet to come. I bet she is just so dang proud of you.>>I love you girl and I can’t wait to meet Wanda.>>Joanne
January 23rd, 2009 at 8:16 am
Oh Angie! What a beautiful tribute to your creating for a woman who left a astounding legacy around the world… one heartbeat at a time.>>Thank you for continuing to share these treasures with us. I love the pix!
January 23rd, 2009 at 8:32 am
Hi, Angie. I feel like I walked through all of this with you, after reading your post. On a human level, this is too much. Too hard. Too sad! Thank the Lord that you are clinging to our only hope. This will be a hard time of year for you I am sure. I bet you can hardly believe it has been a year already. God bless you as you continue to work through this process of grief and loss, and as you grow closer to our God.
January 23rd, 2009 at 9:30 am
We love you all – and are excited that in the coming days we will ALL be together again. Victoria is so blessed to have so many wonderful women in her life who will always remind her of how wonderful and Godly her mommmy was. We miss her – What a Legacy!
January 23rd, 2009 at 2:07 pm
You’ve touched the deepest place in me. When we can enter into the suffering with songs of praise to our Lord. I’m crying. I’m broken by the exchange of that mommy/daughter kiss. I can see it.>>Lifting your pain to the Most High,>Tiffany
January 23rd, 2009 at 6:20 pm
Angie, I believe our entire lives are an expression of our worship to God. It is so obvious that Wanda’s life was a sweet song to the Father.
January 23rd, 2009 at 10:06 pm
I know you have the joy of the blessed hope amidst your pain. Tears of grief flow the same time as the tears of rejoicing….bless you for sharing your heart.
January 23rd, 2009 at 10:07 pm
Beautiful memories~ I’m so glad that you shared this, Angie. Bless your sharing heart.>Love you!
January 24th, 2009 at 11:19 am
Ok…. what a precious gift you had with Wanda…… I have reached out to my sister one more time last week, only to have it thrown back in my face…….. I need you to pray for her…….. I will email you more details…… I so long for the relationship that you had with Wanda…… what a joy…… United in name and united in Spirit…. Sisters by blood and sister by new birth….. There are joys to share in the wonderful eternity that she is already enjoying….. I will enjoy meeting her one day……….
January 24th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
Thanks for sharing Wanda with us. She really was a beautiful child of God.