Focus Forward Ministries, Ministry, Mission Trip, Missions

Praying Beyond Ourselves

I see his face often.  Not just because his sleeping form was captured on a trip in 2011….but because I believe I’m supposed to be praying for him.

There’s another dear lady praying too.  Mrs. Pearline Snell. 

She bought printed copy of my photograph when her church had a mission banquet and his picture was on her table.  

And every morning she prayed for someone…
anyone …
to share with him about Jesus Christ.  The One who came to seek and save all of us…who were lost.  

Millions still are.

It’s up to us to do His seeking–He did commission us after all.  Remember?  

And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.  Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,  teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.

What are we actively doing about the lost?  I hang my head with shame at the lost years–I did nothing.  

World Missions was not on my brain.  Neither was my closest neighbor.

It’s sad that here I am at almost 54–and now I urgently feel compelled to sell all I have and go.  

It’s sad only because it took me so long to pray beyond my own self.  But it’s good that I finally woke up.


When I first saw this man and took his picture–he was sleeping.  My artist friend,  +Betty Shoopman  painted the most amazing gallery size portrait.  It’s huge.  The tag on it when I stood underneath it at Quayside Art Gallery, was $4000.  I wasn’t taken aback–it was an absolutely AMAZING painting.  It captured the attention of every single individual that came in the gallery.  People would stand and stare…mesmerized by the image on canvas.  “Who Do You Say That I Am?” was the title of her painting.  

This man was a nameless, homeless soul…waiting to be found.  That’s what captured me about his image leaning against the brick wall-sleeping in the sunshine.

Just like you and me.  His status in society means nothing.  The fact he has no home–nothing.

I had a prayer in 2014 when we returned to Bolivia.  That I would be able to speak to this man–unknown to me….about One who gave His Life for him to be saved.  
I wanted to tell him about his painting that hung in a gallery with a price tag of $4000, but that he was worth so much more.

So every day I looked.  I searched the faces of people walking, selling, sitting and standing.  I looked into the eyes of everyone I passed hoping to catch a glimpse of this man.

My day and opportunity came.  I was more nervous than I have ever been before getting up to speak in a church!  My butterflies had had babies and they were fluttering to get out.  I think I even woke that morning feeling that “today” might be the day.  I had no idea…

As my translator, her fiance and I returned to the village around lunch, they treated me to a filling meal at a local sandwich place–we have the same ones here in USA, but the meat there was a tad bit different 🙂

We ate and I had previously shared my story.  I took my matted print copy of Betty’s original painting from my bag–I had carried it everyday in hopes of seeing him, and showed it to them.  They were amazed, but couldn’t recall seeing him before.

After our meal, Daniel had half of his foot long sandwich left, an unopened bag of chips and a bottle of water.  As we were driving back to the hotel I spotted him.  I felt the excitement stir as never before.  I mean this was seeing a prayer come to pass before it actually arrives at your doorstep…. All the “are you crazy”? thoughts came tumbling to my head–I pushed them aside with the thought–what if today is meant to be HIS DAY?  What if God brought me all the way from Florida to Bolivia with this one job…to bring Christ to this man…

I felt like my feet weren’t even touching the ground.  As we approached him, I smelled him.  I knew I was about to have nostrils full of a very recognizable stench.  The cardboard sign holding men on the corners at the intersections and at the Walmart parking lot don’t have this smell.  I think the majority of them are out for what they can get from you.  But this man….he was holding no sign.  If anything, his expression was a sign.  Do not enter.

I ignored it.

I squatted down with Daniel and started speaking and Daniel translated.  I told him when I first saw him–how God had used him in my life and others.  I told him that God had answered my prayer in letting me find him today–and that I had been praying for him to know the Jesus that died on the cross.  I told him about the picture, the painting, my friend who prayed–and this was before I knew that that very morning, as with every single morning for more than a year, Mrs. Pearline Snell had prayed that prayer–for God to send someone to share Christ with him.  Today was his day.

I felt from the fact that he wouldn’t look in my direction that I needed to let Daniel do all the talking.  I just began talking to Daniel.  Soon I stood up and asked Fabyata, “what what Daniel saying”?

She said he’s telling him about Jesus–the plan of salvation.  I quickly asked Fabyata, does he even know who Jesus is?  

The man uttered something to Daniel and I asked Fabyata what he said.  “I know who Jesus is” was his reply.  Without emotion.

Then I remembered, every single time I had seen him he had been around this church.  How could he not know?  Perhaps he heard?  Perhaps the singing reached his ears… then I realized– I wasn’t sure what kind of songs they sang at the particular church that he was leaning against.  Maybe none.

I felt pretty confident–they didn’t sing Jesus Loves Me…for this religion was more about Mary–than God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost.   My heart broke that I couldn’t communicate with him personally and tell him in “Angie words”…. but perhaps…this was best.

Daniel offered him his food.  It took some doing–this man without a home–and without a cardboard sign–he was no beggar.  He finally and reluctantly took the food offered but would not accept the 5 x 7 picture I offered with extended hand.  He told Daniel something to tell me– “keep it to remember me by”.

As if.  

As if I would ever forget my first encounter–the prayers prayed–or this day.  No, friend.  I would not forget you.  I will talk about this day–and about you –to anyone who will listen.  

And Betty gave me on loan, the painting to share this story when we are invited to go speak as we begin our own missionary journey.  

On our way to church–after meeting Denny and Betty to accept the painting– we thought that the church we were attending that night for their special mission service might like to have it displayed–just to represent a place that several of their men had gone with us…the deacon I called was very glad to display it.  After being seated, the pastor came and asked would I share a bit about the painting…wow.  First opportunity–and I couldn’t possibly share it all.  But I said yes… actually, Jeff said “yes she will” for me.  

As I shared brief points of the story, I saw a woman out of the corner of my eye, wiping her eyes.  After the service I was able to speak with her and her story you now know– it was an every-single-morning prayer she prayed.  In faith.  Believing that one day–God would send someone to him.  And–God did.  Me.

God answered Pearline’s prayer–and He answered mine…and used me.

I didn’t get the “response” I had hoped for–my hope was to lead him in the sinners prayer…but as I left, still feeling the flutter of the butterflies, I confessed my feelings to Fabyata.  Her response to me was, “You did your job.  You did what you were supposed to do”.

She was right.  God has a plan already set in motion.  Perhaps I will still play a part–but if not, I am okay with that.  I know there are others who are now praying for his salvation.  He has been brought to the attention of the artist when she painted him–and The Artist who created him, never lets him out of His sight.

Now, when I see him in my mind–I know what to do.  Pray.  He’s not forgotten–by God, nor us.  He has become known to us as “Angie’s Bolivian Man”.  When Jeff traveled to Bolivia in December of 2013 without me– he spied him on the side of the church one night coming back into the city.  He called me–with excitement said, “I just saw your Bolivian Man”.  My heart leapt –praying, hoping for the day I actually experienced in 2014.

From 2011 to 2015–God has been stirring our hearts for Bolivia, and not just because of this man.  But because of the millions who don’t know.  Not just Bolivia–but to the uttermost –furtherest place where people dwell.  They are lost….they need to know.

Pray.  Beyond yourself.



(The original painting is not pictured here–but is available to travel for weekend services)


© 2015 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.  Photography copyright protected.  All rights reserved.

Friends, Journals, Mission Trip, Missions

What Ruined My Life

This is a letter to all the girls like Lacy Ridley and +Tiffany Stuart  out there.

Dear Lacy and Tiffany,

Both of you are about to be ruined.

For life.

Lacy, in just 33 days and some odd number of hours, your feet will land on foreign soil    Tiffany, while yours is just a few weeks beyond our own departure, I want to prepare you both.

Eyes.

Every face will hold an expression–some filled with joy…some harder to determine.  Mistrust for sure because of the pain suffered at the hard task master called “life”.

Tiffany, with each click of your camera–you will capture a glimpse into a heart.  Then, you will later gaze back into those eyes and wonder what they were thinking about you.  You, with your bright and ready smile, tender heart and head full of blonde hair–they will look at your eyes and wonder why yours are filled with water…and why that water spills over.

My first trip ruined me for anything and everything else.

For months I couldn’t shop–and wondered why in the world other people were shopping…what could they possibly need.  I cleaned out my closet almost weekly and found, every-single-time, more to give away.

And I cried for lives that I knew lived in hardships that were none of their choosing.  They didn’t choose to walk off of a job and stand in a welfare line.  Jobs are scarce and there is no welfare.

My mind is continually filled with “what more can I do”.  I want to do more.  I lay awake at night and ask God to fill my dreams and my sleep with His plans and show me something that I can learn to do–or something that I can say that will help–in some way.  Somehow.

It’s hard to take enough things to give away–and dangerous too.  Your heart will break the second  you hand your last piece of candy to the dirty outstretched fingers–and you will look beyond those eyes and see dozens more coming….wanting….waiting…

But do take candy.  It’s a sweet gift and don’t often get something wrapped up tight in colorful paper.

Expect to be affected.  By the sounds-sights-and smells.  Some sights will delight….and some sights will bring tears.

There were time it seems when I walked, I felt myself praying with every single step.  And sometimes I could hardly think clearly.

Your first mission trip will likely be the most emotionally draining experience you will ever encounter.  But it will be the emotionally and spiritually best feeling ever as well.

Expect to go to bed each night exhausted–and try and make your mind shut down and sleep.

Journal everything.  I mean take your journal and write down everything you can while you are traveling–because you will forget some things, even though you tell yourself you won’t.

When you come home and tell your heart wrenching stories, some will weep with  you–and others will look at your with kind wonder–but they won’t understand your passion.  And I learned that’s okay.  It’s my passion.  Not theirs.

Everyone is not expected to go on the foreign mission field…but everyone is expected to be involved in missions…in other ways.

Tell your stories.  To anyone who will listen-you never know how your story will inspire someone else to dream big, take a leap of faith, believe God for big things in their own lives.

This was written for my new friend Lacy Ridley, but also for my dear precious friend, Tiffany Stuart who is about to realize her dream…and it will be amazing!

This is also written for all the others out there who, as yet have been afraid to dream.  You don’t need to be afraid…you need to believe.

You can make a difference.  This trip will make a difference…

But be warned….it will ruin you.

It ruined me.

© 2015 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.

Missions

Leave it all behind…

That’s sometimes a hard thing to do.

Some changes are taking place in our lives– the details are here if you have time to pray.  Read and pray.  I know many have friends and family who are undertaking heavy-duty changes in their own lives, from parents aging and declining, to kids graduating and moving on–to daughters marrying– and new families beginning… it’s tough.  I remember all of our milestones.  Especially recently as we’ve had to walk back through a lot of our history.

I know if you are like me–reading another email is the last thing you want to do–so it’s totally okay.  If you can’t read, just scroll on by and say a prayer for Jeff and Angie.  For the journey ahead.

The song by Casting Crowns struck me one day when +April Pettis  sang it at church as such a part of our lives.  We try to hang on to things God wants to relieve us of… why?

We will walk much better without the burden.  We can climb without the load we are trying to keep tied to our back.

I have often had to stop and evaluate what or who had attached itself or themselves to my life.  And I had to make a decision.  Sink or swim.  Climb or slide back down the mountain.

As tough as the climb is many days–I choose to climb.  As +Sherri Evans  preached during her retreat in Panama City this year, it’s on the mountain that God will reveal Himself to us–we must choose to ascend to the mountain of God.  It’s a choice we have to make.  On our own.  Because it’s our own breath we will suck in with each step–it’s our own feet that will navigate through the crevices and rough terrain ahead.  But it is God who guides each step…and we will not stumble if we keep our focus on Him.

© 2014 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.
Photography copyright protected 2015.  Angie Knight Photography.
Bolivia

Lasting Impressions

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Have you ever wanted to do something that made a lasting impression?  A good one.  I’ve encountered my share of bad impressions, and they’ve lasted a while, but good impressions, I believe last longer.  Good impressions live in the hearts and minds of others and in times of heartache, a good impression is often retrieved for comfort.

Do you enjoy giving a long thought out gift for a dear friend or loved one?  They see you–and know you love them and care for their well being.  But, let me share with you something I discovered:

Often in giving, the best feeling is knowing they don’t have to know who you are.  The recording of your love and compassion is recorded for all eternity.

The greatest joy for me, is watching these teachers receive what YOU gave.  If you could see into the eyes and hearts of these teachers and the principal (standing beside Jeff), you would experience the joy of giving–as never before.  It was like Christmas to these.

Necessary items that our schoolers take for granted, these do not.  We are so accustomed to running to the dollar store or local wally-world that we forget there are those who have no such luxury.

Luxury?  A trip to the dollar store?

Indeed.

These teachers (and there are about 9 not pictured), have the joy of teaching and training the next generation–but they must do so with such limited income and in order to teach, most of them give more than just their time.  They give their income.

In order to have paper for the students, the teachers buy it.

To color, write or draw, more often than not, the tool comes from the teachers.  We discovered that in order to make copies, the teacher has to travel about 30 minutes to a neighboring town to make copies because the school had no copier or printer.  The Lord supplied that need through someone who sent with us a copier for the principal.  And several purchased print cartridges.

This past year, we took more supplies and more printers.  Three to be exact.  So that the teachers could all have access to things that are needed in the class room.  God burdened someone’s heart with that treasure for the school at Don Lorenzo.

This year, we are traveling back, but to 4 different schools.  We hope, through generous donations to be able to take supplies, and even a printer or two.  The school supplies are of utmost importance.  Through your gifts of crayons, pencils, sharpeners, rulers, glue, etc. we are able to bless them and help with the education process of these growing children.

100_1598This little girl (Ruth), who every team member came to love in 2013, needed a new walker.  We took up an offering among us and had enough to buy her a nice walker that will grow with her and help her navigate the dirt road where she lives–and we made a lasting impact on her life.

We really never know what needs we will encounter that we aren’t expecting.  But, rest assured, we always encounter needs.

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The needs are there.

The needs are often more than we can meet.

But with the help of friends back home, we can.  It takes us all working together to bear the burden for others.

We will take new testaments for the children, and gifts for the teachers, through the very generous donations from a group of women in a local church, they have supplied us with handmade pot holders!  (We are beyond excited!)

So, maybe you have read all this and wonder, “what can I do to make a lasting impression”.  I’m glad you asked!

We are taking New Testaments, soccer balls with scripture on them, and school supplies.  You may simply make your check out to Focus Forward Ministries, Inc. and drop it in the mail to Post Office Box 5773, Marianna, Florida 32447, and mark it Mission to Bolivia.  We leave May 30 and hope to take boxes of generous love and donations to those we have grown to love and care about!

IF you are near us and would like to drop off a box to us to pack with our belongings, you know where we live!  We gratefully accept your support and prayers!

And, if you know us well, you know that God has been working in our hearts for a “new step of faith”…and we sure would appreciate all your prayers.  Really.

Time is short–and our desire is to do all we can–with every breath in our bodies, until He calls us home.  we want our impression to be Jesus.  And He is everlasting.

copyrightsignature 2015

© Angie Knight 2015.  All rights reserved.  Photos copyright protected.  All rights reserved.

Missions

The Waiting Game

The title is actually an oxymoron.  Or seems to me.  Waiting is no game.  
Games are meant to be fun…waiting is usually tied and constricted to enduring.  Or in my book that’s been the experience.  Patience.   Or the lack there of shows up in in the waiting game.  
When you’re waiting, you like to stay busy–did I say “you”?  I meant me.  Totally pinning this on myself.  I LIKE TO STAY BUSY.
It makes the wait shorter–or seems to.  Time flies then.
The day I took this picture I was outside waiting, just like these two.  But my wait was short compared to theirs.  Their wait was a life time.  All for a concrete floor.
The team of men and us two girls who tagged along (yes, I did just call Rene and myself girls), were preparing and creating a concrete floor for some homeowners in Honduras.  Their first one.  It would be in the living area–which is also the sleeping area.  The only other area in the house was the kitchen.  The men in the group were creating concrete mixture of substance that they then carried in buckets and dumped it in the middle of the floor and two men started spreading.  Everyone wanted to help.  We had men shoveling sand (Rene and I helped in this) and men mixing, men carrying water, and men smoothing the mixture.  On hands and knees these two worked–smoothing out, spreading more–smoothing out– making sure this floor was as substantial as possible working with what they had.
The living area was small and dark.  The pock holes in the metal roof looked like stars were shining in the daylight.  However, those same pock holes meant that rain water created rivers inside the house.  Water had the potential to carve out gullies where they slept.  And more often than not, it did.
This was June of 2013.  I remember the feel of the air–the sounds and the smells.  It, like every other mission trip, put a mark on my heart.  This was one of three trips I took without Jeff.   I prefer the ones with him…but God used these to work on “me”.  To help me see what was in my life that I could do without…
As we prepare for Bolivia and the children’s crusade, He’s doing that again.  God is showing me what I can do without…and there are still many things.  As much as I have sliced away at my belongings, there’s still more.  But now, He’s slicing away at other things.  Harbored hurts.  And it has brought me to my knees.  And this morning as I said aloud, “Jesus…loves….me”– I realize fresh there are millions and millions who have no idea that Jesus loves them enough that He came and died for them.
Our hearts desire is to do more and more for Jesus–and for those He puts into our lives.  Even though, at times, like NOW, the wait seems long.  We really only have 50 days to take off!  

50 DAYS!
Can I tell you something?  We have a few team members who are having some difficulty with raising the remainder of their funds.  Can you help us pray for them?  Everyone (including Jeff and myself) are responsible for their trip funds.  And we’ve been doing everything from cleaning a house or two, sewing dresses, selling “Thirty-One”–  to construction work.   
If God lays it on your heart to give–please consider donating to the “team member in need”.  They have a work to do–God has already assigned them.  I know–from my past experience in this that God grows our faith in these times.  And it is the efforts of many that much work is done.
Perhaps you can’t go, maybe have no desire to go–that’s okay!  God loves using people like you to help send!  Yay!  Your heart and talents may be IN giving!
It is with grateful hearts that we will go and share the gospel of Jesus–and YOU, my dear precious reader, can have a part in that.  Those who give has just as much a part as those who go!
Thank you …. for helping.  Thank you for praying and sending and donating.  Your faith is an action.
  And our waiting… feels more like a game.  Because we are seeing God do so much-sowing and reaping, through faithful hearts and lives.

© 2015 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.
Photography- Angie Knight.  All rights reserved.

Easter, faith

Pray

He went out and made His way as usual to the Mount of Olives, and the disciples followed Him.  When He reached the place, He told them, “Pray that you may not enter into temptation.”  Then He withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, knelt down, and began to pray,  “Father, if You are willing, take this cup away from Me–nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.”  Luke 22:39-42 HCSB

The evening had come, the supper partaken.  
The sounds from the city wide festivities created a background noise in the room, which seemed to echo the history rehearsed at the table.  This night, would embed itself into the minds of the disciples as nothing else, until the cross.  From the water trickling over their feet as Jesus knelt before them, to the dipping of the bread, —as each word spoken by Him would hang in the air- they would soon see Him on the cross.
But before the cross, came the garden.  The place they must have gone time and time again for rest, relaxation.  A familiar place that perhaps had peaceful memories, but tonight- their failure to be watchful, would haunt their hearts.
They are weary.  And who could blame them?  The sun beating down, walking for miles and miles, days on end, that is wearying enough.  But now, the temperature is cooler and with appetites satiated, they seem carefree.  The dangers Jesus had spoken of earlier–now a distant conversation as they joy in the songs and being with Him alone, rather than sharing His presence with thousands.
Their eyes adjusted to the moonlit night in such a way that they have no difficulty seeing where they are going.  They find a comforting spot to rest as He instructs, “pray that you might not enter into temptation”.
That seems to be the struggle with many.  I know I struggle with praying–not the words so much, as the purpose of getting away with Jesus.  I let too many hindrances take rule in that area.  My attention gets diverted by the activities of so many things going on at one time– and I succumb to the busy rather than the quiet He instructs…. “pray that you might not enter into temptation.”
And pages before we found Martha–she was busy about some good things–necessary things, but Mary…Mary had chosen the better.  Jesus confirmed it.  The better.
There are things that clamor daily for our attention.  Yours and mine.  And more often than not, I let the wrong thing rule.  
The better thing is to come aside with Him in the garden, pray with Him.  But here I sit, asleep.  You too maybe?
I have watched and participated in many Passion Plays –and with each one, rehearsing the story over and over, reading it for myself from the thin pages of my Bible, I could see it unfold.  Yet, we tell the PG rated version– because in reality, our minds and eyes couldn’t not handle the full truth of the passion of Jesus Christ.
I remember watching the movie, “The Passion of The Christ” in a theater, and left that night in such anguish.  I could hear people all over the theater sobbing– and I did my best to hold in as much as I could–but my guts clinched and my tears ran like rivers, as I watched-what was more like the truth of what Jesus actually endured that night.  We can’t fully know.  We couldn’t handle fully knowing. 
When we left the theater that night, neither one of us could speak for what seemed like hours.  Conversation seemed trivial.  It was as if what He had done for humanity had come home in our hearts.  And we would never be the same.
Today, Saturday– I know He’s at the right hand of The Father, forever making intercession–but THAT Saturday, His disciples were mourning–they were remembering…
“Pray, that you might not enter into temptation”….

© 2015 Angie Knight- The Knightly News. All rights reserved.

Photography credit:  © Beverly M. Anderson.  Mount of Olives 2013.  Used by permission.  All rights reserved.